suddenly i see a.k.a. me getting addicted to posting videos

kt tunstall singing the song i love to play in the morning while getting ready to face the world. check out her guitar, i wouldn't mind getting something like it for christmas! :D

tell him (colbie caillat)

one of my favorite songs of all time. not as good as lauryn hill's version, pero pwede na rin :)

heart of the matter (india arie)

a really beautiful cover by a really talented artist

bangkok dangerous

just an amusing thing.

my thai friend somphon, bade and i were driving in the streets of bangkok from a night out late last year when we ran into a detour. somphon opened the window to ask a bystander what was happening, and when he turned to us dear foreigners to explain what was causing the delay, he said that a hollywood film was being shot right ahead of us.

"ask him who's the actor in the film," bade told somphon.

"arrgh," protested somphon, but he knew the most painless way out of it was to do as he was told.

"i swear if it's colin farrell, i'm getting out of this car," i told bade.

"nicolas cage," somphon reported.

and we drove happily ever after.

a few months later, it was somphon's turn to visit. while he, bade and i were killing time at mall of asia waiting for his flight back to thailand, we passed by the cinema to check out movie posters.

"hey look, somphon," bade said. "bangkok dangerous."

starring nicolas cage.

life's a bitch and then you...get chicken pox

this is, no doubt, the most horrendous feeling EVERRRR.

after years of eluding chicken pox, it finally caught up with me last weekend. now i wonder how all those classmates in gradeschool who disappeared one by one in class managed to nurse these itchy bumps.the discomfort is just too much, even for a grownup!

now i'm stuck at home.until i don't know when.can't even look at the mirror.bet my work's piling up as i type this. people around me can't stand my whining anymore.and everyone's worried the kids might get infected too. geez. there is only one person i know who will be happy about this misfortune: my dermatologist.

Lucky

woke up this morning to his call. he just came out of a 24-hour duty on, ironically, Labor Day...i competely understood why he sounded so down and tired. then he just poured his heart out, and we were both reminded why this is worth all the waiting, the worrying and the crying.

Lucky
by Jason Mraz and Colbie Calliat

Do you hear me,
I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

though the breezes through trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning round
You hold me right here right now

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
I'm lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ooooh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

dao-ed and all kung fu-ey

I heard it was a great movie, but i never got the chance to see it...until my 7-year old nephew Gelo and my 6-yr old niece Chay pounced on my bed Sunday morning with a DVD copy of Kung Fu Panda. We had breakfast in bed while watching all the action--I had to cover their mouths to keep them from spilling what's gonna happen next.

I must be quite depressed the past weeks, or maybe I really am just as weird as my friends say, but this movie just enlightened me.haha. And suddenly, I wanted to make things right.

Some unforgettable lines...

Mr. Ping (sharing the secret ingredient to his Secret Ingredient Soup): The secret ingredient is ... nothing!
Po: Huh?
Mr. Ping: You heard me. Nothing! There is no secret ingredient.
Po: Wait, wait ... it's just plain old noodle soup? You don't add some kind of special sauce or something?
Mr. Ping: Don't have to. To make something special you just have to believe it's special.
Po: There is no secret ingredient ...

Master Shifu: Master, I have bad news.
Master Oogway: Calm down Shifu, there is just news. There's no bad or good.

Townspeople to the Dragon Warrior: How can we repay you? Dragon Warrior: There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness.

And my favorite part of the movie...

Master Oogway (when Master Shifu says the villain Tai Lung has returned): That is bad news, if you do not believe that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.
Master Shifu: Panda ?! Master that panda is not the Dragon Warrior, he wasn't even meant to be here ! It was an accident !
Master Oogway: There are no accidents.
Master Shifu: Ahhh, yes I know, you'd said that already, twice.
Master Oogway: Well, that was no accident either.
Master Shifu: Thrice.
Master Oogway: My dear friend, that panda will never fulfill his destiny nor you yours, until you let go of the illusion of control.
Master Shifu: Illusion ?
Master Oogway: Yes, look at this tree Shifu. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, or make it bear fruits before it's time.
Master Shifu: But there are things we can control. I can control when the fruits will fall. And I can control where to plant the seed. That is no illusion Master.
Master Oogway: Ahhh yes, but no matter what you do, that seed it will grow into a peach tree, you may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
Master Shifu: But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung !
Master Oogway: Maybe it can, if you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.
Master Shifu: But how ! How !? I need your help Master!
Master Oogway: No, you just need to believe. Promise me Shifu, promise me you will believe.

And so I'm now too Dao-ed for my own good. I'm letting go of the illusion of control and I'll just believe, because there is no secret ingredient...you just have to believe something is special. Skadoosh!

JOB OPENING IN THE OFFICE OF SENATE MAJORITY LEADER KIKO PANGILINAN

ok.so i said this blog is personal, no work-related stuff. but for my own personal benefit i need a junior writer who'll share with me the joys of writing fiesta messages and speeches. haha. so...i'm reposting this here. bear with me.

Good day! The Office of Senate Majority Leader Kiko Pangilinan is urgently looking for a new Political Communications Officer, preferably a fresh graduate of a communications course. We are looking for someone who's ready to learn from others; a team player who is personable & articulate in Filipino (other dialects preferred :D ) Must be passionate about the development of our country and can write & defend his or her views.

Please send your resumes to ina.claravall@gmail.com and to colorbars7@gmail.com before August 24, 2008. Thanks. Do feel free to forward to your networks.

i'm loving...

A trip to the supermarket with Ditas (my so-called stepmom/officemate/shrink/driver/lunch date) got me acquainted with two really cheap but really great products. I'm loving...

1. Olay Daily Purifying Body Wash with Sea Salts and Microbeads. Really fresh, not-so-strong, not-your-usual-sweet scent. The beads are there but they're not harsh at all, AND you feel moisturized but not in a Dove-sticky-moisturized kind of way. Had to text Bade, who's with P&G just to rave.

2. L'oreal Elseve Nutri-gloss serum. Since having my hair colored and straightened again last June, no amount of hot oil treatment made my hair shine. This product did the trick. And sooo cheap too. I've been computing the money I'm saving from not going to the salon. :)

My Happy Ending

I fidgeted in my seat as I sipped into my cup of cappuccino. I'm not a coffee drinker, but what the heck. If coffee really triggered the nerves, I wouldn't have known the difference. My anxiety was slaughtering my cool so bad.

My eyes scanned the coffee shop. Thank god for Mocha Blends on a Sunday night. I honestly didn't know how things could turn out, and with only a few tables filled and no one familiar in sight, I should be safe from embarrassment regardless of how this meeting would end.

I checked my e-mail from my phone to kill some time, and a few minutes later, I spotted him outside the coffee shop. I squinted to see him dial a number on his phone. Right on cue, my phone rang as he caught a glimpse of me from where I was sitting. He walked into Mocha Blends as I tried to remember what I was there for.

I just need to know what happened, so I can forgive and forget.

Then that familiar stride. That familiar look. That familiar, timid face. Almost five months of not seeing each other, of hurt and confusion, and there he was right in front of me.

My question on my way to Mocha Blends: will it end up being a slap or a hug when I first see him? Either of the two scared me. When he entered, it was obvious he was calculating his move himself. After I looked at him for a moment, I motioned a quick hug, but he swept me in his arms into the tightest,longest embrace. He was trembling.

His back was on everybody else, so I had the honor of seeing the surprised expression on every customer's face. Public display of affection irks the Filipino psyche no end.

"I missed you," he whispered.

The sudden surge of emotion was replaced by awkwardness as we seated ourselves.

"So," he said.

"So," I answered back.

"How have you been?" he asked.

Now I've played this scene on my mind over and over before and I had a ready answer for his question. But he was faster.

"No forget that. I know I've caused you enough trouble, and I'm here to apologize for everything that happened," he said.

And as if to mock us, our song suddenly played on the background. I pretended to ignore the unexpected score, but recognition registered on his face as he continued.

"I know I said I wanted another chance over the phone, but thinking about the hurt I caused you, I don't know if I even deserve to ask that from you," he said.

I tried to lose the melody playing and his image in a brown shirt--my favorite color--and remembered the struggle to be okay on my own for five whole months. I remembered working so late everyday so I'd be too tired to think when I get home. I recalled making answers for myself to lessen the confusion. And I reminded myself just how plain painful it was to smile when I felt like crying each time.

"What happened?" I asked squarely.

As if to add up to the events unfolding, I spotted a van pulling over the parking lot. It was a very familiar van. Soon enough, my suspicion was justified: My officemates, four or five of them, got off the car. Now these people were the ones who suggested the venue for this meeting, and seeing them line up like little spies pretending they didn’t know me…I just couldn’t believe how slow I was.

I shook my head to shake off the silly image outside my window. Good thing his back’s on them. He didn’t seem to realize my little distraction.

“I tried to come home like I promised, but I wanted to surprise you that’s why I said I wasn’t. I booked for two airlines, whichever opens up. But then we started fighting, and you stopped taking my calls. I just got fed up, and I was letting things settle first. I thought it was just another one of our fights, but that we’d still get back together. But the days just turned to months. I did try to call you but you didn’t pick up. So I tried to move on, because I was mad too for us breaking up for no reason. But I can’t move on without you,” he said.

We looked at each other for a very long time, and I suddenly forgot all the hurt and all the doubts I harbored since we separated. I was thinking, whatever happens I was ready to start fresh and contented. I had no bad feelings anymore, and I felt lighter than I ever did in the recent past.

Nobody wanted to move. Clearly, everything has been said already, but neither wanted to start goodbye.

“No. Wait. Listen,” he said like he always did before. “Could we start over? Could you give me another chance? For the last time.”

Now I was trembling.

“If I don’t get back together with you, it’s gonna hurt. But if I do get back together with you, it’s gonna hurt too,” I said, more to myself than to him. And at this point, I just lost control already, I started to cry.

Then out of the blue, and I vividly remember how fast it happened, he reached for my side of the table to grasp my hand. He held it achingly that the strong feeling—of hurt? Yearning? Love?—was transported from him to me and back.

“I’m not even gonna promise you anything. But the past five months, I did nothing but think of what I could’ve done to make things right. And I know now, and it’s gonna be different, if only you’ll give me that chance,” he said looking at me straight in the eye.

So that’s my happy ending. But as they say, endings are beginnings too, and we really are starting another hard road. Being apart is not my concept of happily ever after, but as we always tell each other: “It’s part of the package.” I’m just grateful I’m taking this chance with the only guy who has ever captured my heart. :)